December 2020

Holidays, more than other times of the year, are filled with sensations that leave us vulnerable and make the experience of loss harder and more poignant—the sights, the sounds, the smells.  The ebb and flow of grief can overwhelm us as we recall special holiday moments with our loved ones.  This is especially true in this season of COVID.  Also, if we have lost our loved ones in the holiday season, grief can be even more intense.

Here are some Holiday Helps to cope with grief:

*Physical:  You have the RIGHT to:

Watch your physical health by:

Engaging in physical activity, getting your beauty sleep, eating and drinking healthily, following COVID health guidelines of wearing a mask, social distancing, avoiding large gatherings.

*Emotional:  You have the RIGHT to: 

Feel and experience your emotions. 

Allow personal times to feel your grief.

*Mental:  You have the RIGHT to:   

Have memories of happy holiday events.

Honor your loved ones by lighting a memorial candle, writing a letter or poem, doing something you enjoyed together.  My Mom and I always toured our little hometown to look at the Christmas lights!  I continue this with BO the Doggie who LOVES it as did our previous Baron!

Develop new rituals.

Be realistic:  Decrease your expectations of self.

Reach out for help!  See BELOW IN SOCIAL!  

*Social:  You have the RIGHT to:  

Honor where you are.

Allow yourself time to be alone, or leave social events early, or not attend.

Get a gift for the needy or donate to a charity.

Spend time with a pet!!  Or like my aunt, GET A PET!  

Reach out for help if needed!  Every state has a Crisis Helpline.  The NATIONAL CRISIS HELPLINE AND PREVENTION SUICIDE LIFELINE is:

800-273-8255.   PASS IT ON!  

*Spiritual:  You have the RIGHT to: 

Embrace your spirituality, or not.

Search for meaning, ask WHY.

Spend time in nature.

Have a specific time for devotions/inspirational time.

Reach out to a spiritual resource if needed personally or by participating in live streaming, socially distanced services, or expressing needs through an online support group.

REMEMBER:  YOU WILL SURVIVE AND HOPEFULLY SOMEDAY, THRIVE!

BLESSINGS IN THIS HOLIDAY SEASON AND BEYOND,

CAROLYN

This week marks two great events that occur this week.

The first important event is the Winter Solstice which arrives on Monday, December 21 at 4:20 am CST.  The Winter Solstice celebrates the longest hours of darkness or the rebirth of the sun in the Northern hemisphere.  It is believed to hold powerful energy for regeneration, renewal, and self-reflection.  It also symbolizes the birth of the sun and is representative of the birth of the Son, Jesus.

In Christianity, the night of the 21st of December is also sometimes called Blue Christmas or a time of Lament and Grief as we consider our own lives.  For me personally, I have experienced the loss of four persons I dearly loved in the past five months, one to the dreaded Covid, and I will be pondering these losses as well of those occurring worldwide due to the Pandemic and its accompanying catastrophes.

What will YOU be reflecting upon this Winter Solstice?!  

This also marks the fourth week of Advent in the Christian religion and the theme is…LOVE!  For me, this heralds the second most important event in the Western Christian religion, the birth of LOVE itself in the form of Jesus.  It is this gift of Love itself through Jesus that makes it possible for me to cope with the joys and sorrows of life. (Other branches of Christianity celebrate the birth of Jesus at later dates in January).

Love permeates the entire life of Jesus, his ministry, his death, and Resurrection. Love is the reason for Jesus’s entire purpose for being on Earth.  “That’s what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown,” said Linus to Charlie in A Charlie Brown Christmas.  I freely admit I watch this every year!  

How does LOVE manifest in your life?

I wish you and yours the BEST of LOVE in this Holiday Season!

Carolyn Q.

In Seminary, I had the privilege of studying all the major spiritual traditions of the world.  While I am Christian, it gave me a much broader understanding of other traditions and what these have in common.  The theme of light permeates several traditions and in the month of December!

Today, we look at Buddhism from the story of The Buddha and then share this week’s theme of Advent in Christianity.

Buddha was born Siddartha Gautama in northern India/Nepal approximately 2600 years ago.  He was a prince and his parents wanted to shield and protect him from the harsh realities of life.  But Siddartha wanted to know more about the world and he secretly escaped the palace several days in a row.  He was totally overcome by witnessing the suffering in life, especially sickness, old age, and death.

He was so overcome he left his sheltered, wealthy existence to seek the true nature of the mind for the benefit of all beings.  For six years, he searched to find Truth and studied, meditated, and lived an austere life.  He finally meditated for several days under what has become known as the Bodhi tree and the nature of Buddhism’s truth of the mind was revealed to him.  He achieved unconditional and lasting happiness, free of disturbing emotions, and filled with fearlessness, joy, and compassion.  

He spent the rest of the next 45 years sharing what he had learned with all who would receive.  This is a somewhat simplified version and I encourage you, if you choose, to seek further “enlightenment” of Buddhism through sources such as:  “The Enlightenment of The Buddha,” Learn Religions; or “Shakyamuni Buddha’s Enlightenment: What did the Buddha Realize?”  By Domyo.  4/6/2017.  Buddhist History. Buddhist Teachings. 

In Christianity, the theme for this week is awaiting the arrival of Jesus’s coming.  More on this theme in the midweek post.  What are you awaiting the arrival of in your own life, and how do you do this?  I look forward to the arrival of the curing of Covid and its devastating effects globally.  In the meantime, I WEAR MY MASK!  

Blessings,

Carolyn