July 2021

I don’t know about you, but life has thrown me some real curveballs (often of my own making) which I have not known how to deal with.  

As I went through these difficult situations, phrases were often given to me by the Universe to help me cope!  Here I share a few which have made a difference in my life and the stories that go with them:  

PSALM 42:  

In 7th grade, I was a gawky tomboy trying to become a “girl.” Making good grades was of supreme importance to me and science was not my best subject. On one test, I copied an answer from the boy in front of me. Our teacher confronted the entire class about someone cheating and said whoever did it had to come forward!  I cried inside for two days, prayed for help, and just opened my Bible, landing on Psalm 42.  It was a lifesaver, and gave me comfort then, and now!

“EASE THE POUNDING OF MY HEART…”

I also have had a lifelong problem with anxiety which this awful episode of course kicked up. Another phrase that the Universe gave me before I went to “confess” was the “..Ease the pounding of my heart by the quieting of my mind.” Shaking, trembling, and crying, I went to my teacher and confessed that I had cheated. I did receive my punishment, which was bearable. The same two sources of comfort helped me confess to my parents and I do not even remember the consequences!  

To this day, these two sources provide me with comfort in difficult situations and also help me to calm down.

 “KNOCK IT OFF”    

Later in life, I worked in group mental health therapy. One major issue that my senior clients dealt with was the loss of a loved one. One patient, who I will call Frank, cried in every group session; nothing the group or I tried with him helped! In between groups, he would call and bemoan with whoever answered the phone. One afternoon as I struggled to get my progress notes done, Frank called, bemoaning he was depressed and did not know what to do, which he often did. Out of frustration, I blurted out, “Knock it off, Frank!” To my utter surprise, Frank BURST OUT LAUGHING! From that time forward, Frank was no longer as depressed, was able to tell himself to knock it off, and moved eventually forward into another relationship!  

(This is not a therapeutic technique I would normally recommend)!😊

“I AM SO SORRY!”

Much of my work in later years has been with those who have suffered trauma through abuse, all kinds of losses, and other grief. Most of us often do not know what to say in moments such as these. The most powerful phrase I have found time after time is simply to say, “I am sorry,” or, “I am so, so sorry.” 

These simple powerful words say it all. 

“IT IS WHAT IT IS!” 

For many years I have just not liked this phrase. However, the older I have gotten, the more this phrase has simply helped me accept what is happening in my life at that moment, and to accept the reality of the situation, too. I quit fighting, trying to change whatever it is, and simply deal with what is. 

I invite you to share phrases that have helped you in your life, and the stories that go with them because you never know when you might help yourself and someone else!  

Blessings,

Carolyn

REMEMBERING MORE FAMILY HEROES

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!  Today I honor more of my family members who have served!

George Joseph Stevenson:  “Mick”

Mick Stevenson was the oldest boy in the Stevenson clan, named after his Dad. He like all his sibs but my Mom were born in Concordia, Kansas. My favorite story told by my Mom was that she caught her brothers Mick and Jack smoking in the basement as the smoke rolled up through a hole in the floorboards. Mom reported them to Grandma who promptly got a can of tobacco and made them smoke it all! Uncle Jack got really sick and did not smoke anymore! Tough Mick smoked till later in life! Mick also had several other adventures in his youth!

Mick, like his Dad before him, joined the Army near the end of World War II. The war was over before he was shipped out so he served in peacetime. Wasn’t he handsome?!

Mick returned home and met the love of his life Faye in Republican City, Nebraska where his family was.  

 Mick and Faye had 6 wonderful kids who have been through thick and thin together. Mick was a plumber his whole life and his son David followed him in this profession. The youngest of the 6, Kenneth, served in the Army in Desert Storm as an engineer. Two bricks honoring Mick and Kenneth’s military services were purchased by the family in a Memorial Brick Garden in Manhattan.

The Stevensons faced many things in their lives, the most serious being the total loss of two homes due to fires, one at Christmas when fortunately they were not home, and 10 years later, the second home when Mick, Faye, and two youngest kids were home.  Mick helped get everyone out safely but his own lungs were singed badly. Later he suffered two bouts of throat cancer resulting in a laryngectomy and getting a voice box the rest of his life. He still maintained his sense of humor through it all! Aunt Faye said these total losses of homes taught what is really important in life.

Later in life Mick and Faye became like second parents to me and supported me in areas when my own parents could not, and based on some of their own life experiences. They were Godsends to me! I would often tell Aunt Faye first! They stayed one winter in Arizona to attend my ordination as a minister. Mick and I shared our stories of recovery. They were salt of the earth, maintained their humor whatever life threw at them, and was sustained by their Catholic faith. They spent many wonderful years traveling in their motorhome, just as Faye’s folks had done, and now their oldest daughter Bev and husband are doing!

Charles Francis “Chuck” Stevenson

The Stevenson boys from the left and my dad Walt on the far right.

Uncle Chuck beloved by nieces and nephews: With Richard, Carolyn Walters, and Janet Tieking.

Chuck was born in Republican City, Nebraska, and after high school graduation, moved with his folks and siblings to Washington State. Uncle Chuck served in the Army, first at Ft. Riley, Kansas, and later in Germany. My family was living in Manhattan near Ft. Riley at the time and we got to see him often!  

Uncle Chuck loved kids and was in return loved by them!  Some of my greatest memories were of him at ages 3 and 4 and teaching me how to dive.  One of my favorite stories was when he tried to cut my hair with dog clippers to save money. I heard him say, “Oops!” when he goofed. It was the worst haircut ever!  He tried to teach me how to drive in his old ’39 car. I slammed on the brakes and sent his glasses flying into the backseat!  From then on, he called the car Galloping Gertie!

Other cousins have their stories with Uncle Chuck. (Please share)!  Kenneth, who you met earlier, named their youngest son after Chuck when he was born on Chuck’s birthday.

 Uncle Chuck taught elementary school for 33 years in the same school and raised orchids and champion Boston Terriers.  He was always there for his family, especially his Mom after she was widowed. He died doing what he loved, judging at a dog show! He was buried near his parents and other family members.

I guess you can tell how much I love my maternal family. Being the first grandchild has always been very cool!  

May your 4th of July now and in the future be a celebration of our country, our freedoms, and our ancestors!  

Blessings

Carolyn